The Surgery Was The Easiest Part:

The Surgery was the Easiest Part: Rebuilding After Chiari Decompression

One year ago today, they gave me my life back.

For those who don't know: I have Chiari Malformation—a condition where the cerebellum, the base of the brain, herniates into the spinal canal. In my case, severely compressing the brain stem, restricting blood and spinal fluid flow and trapping my nervous system in a constant fight-or-flight state that my body couldn't escape.

The symptoms were devastating. Relentless headaches. Brain fog so thick I couldn't think clearly. A dysregulated body that felt like it was betraying me every single day. But the worst part? Being told over and over by doctors that this wasn't the problem.

I lost everything while searching for answers. My home. Friendships. My career suffered as people labeled me lazy, dramatic, someone who exaggerated. My mental health spiraled. My finances collapsed. I was gaslit into doubting my own reality, until I finally found a surgeon who listened.

This was actually my second decompression surgery. I had already gone through this hellish experience 15 years ago. I already knew what was happening to my body, but no one would listen because they didn't know enough about Chiari, or about me and didn't try to. I had to figure out on my own which doctor had enough experience with this to hear me. I then had to change my insurance, and make my way up a new ladder of medical professionals one at a time taking about 2 years to finally get in with the one I knew I needed.

After all of that, all it took was 5 minutes in his office before he stated what I knew all along, that my brain had reherniated and another procedure was my best option. Finally I had hope again. A few weeks later we went in, and he did phenomenal work. This procedure restored blood flow to my brain, released my body from a sympathetic response prison, gave me back clarity of mind, and the ability to regulate my body again.

This past year has been spent grieving. Grieving all that was lost. Feeling the injustice of a medical system designed to profit from our pain rather than heal it. The weight of realizing just how much your value drops to people when your productivity is limited. But I'm choosing now to shift into gratitude as I put those pieces back together and create a new life.

Gratitude that I had the knowledge and awareness to push back. The fortitude to keep going when it felt utterly hopeless. The physical surgery? That was actually the easiest part of this journey.

I'm grateful for the few people who stuck it out. For my children, whose lives have been unfairly rocked by my health issues time and time again—they deserved better, and I'm working every day to give them that now. For my work and my clients who bring such value to my life. For the ability to finally lean into healing not just my body, but my heart and my soul from some of the most devastating times in my life.

Nothing is perfect. Life is still hard. But clarity of mind is a gift I will never again take for granted.

If you're reading this and you know something is wrong with your body, trust yourself. Do the research. Stand firm when people push back. Your self-knowledge matters more than anyone's ego. You deserve answers.

To anyone still searching: I see you. Keep fighting. You are not alone.